Sunday, August 3, 2008

Back at Uni and have no time

Hey everyone. Sorry for not blogging in ages, I just have been so busy back at Uni and back at work. Not only that but my regular monthly internet shaping happened yet again even after we had a huge house meeting about our usage. Oh well our housemate is moving out soon-ish so it isn't worth getting a new higher usage plan. So my internet has been super slow and impossible to use, hence no blogging and no reading other blogs.

Anyway I got my docs in the mail yesterday.

I love love love love love them. They are the perfect fit and exactly what I wanted for so long. It was a bit scary for a while because the post office had lost my parcel and were looking for it for half an hour before sending me away to call some number about my missing post. Just as I was angrily leaving they called out "Wait we found it" and they were so nice about it really, 3 people were looking for it and they all seemed puffed out in the end. I was so relieved, I have never had any post go missing before so this would have been the 1st time. I can still trust them, yay.

Also seeing as I'm back at Uni I'm also back at Footscray Savers shopping up a storm.

I bought this dress for $5.99. It is actually full length but I'm just holding up the bottom in the photo, I'm going to cut and hem all my skirts and dresses next weekend....hopefully. I'm not exactly sure how to wear the docs because they are so patterned can I wear pattern with them? I'll work it out soon. I really just want to look grungey and messy at the moment, like I don't care about fashion when I really do. I think its because of my street fashion photos (new ones up at I have became really inspired by the people I meet and take photos of. Not all my photos end up on the website because its up to the editor, and most of the people I really like don't get on because they are too messy, so I'm not sure if you can see what I'm talking about but I'll try and get some shots for here of the people who inspire me soon.

This floral dress is also from Savers for $9.99. I look super retarded in the photo but we had to be quick in the stairwell because Henry was in his pyjamas, lol. It's not like anyone uses the stairs but Henry was embarrassed. You can't really tell but the dress has a nice shape and a strange hood thing that you can wear. I think someone home made the dress because it's very unusual. Again I don't think floral docs plus a floral dress is a great look but I never want to take my docs off again, that's how much I love them. I'm also carrying all my Uni books in my new backpack, which is also from Savers.

The backpack was $5.99 and it is so 90's cool. I used to have one very similar from Sportsgirl when I was 12-13. It actually got stolen out the front of my house one day. I just left it for a minute to go inside to get a drink after school and when I got back it was gone. I went to the local police station to report it missing but of course it never turned up. All it would have had in it would have been an uneaten banana and some lip gloss. I loved that bag though, it was one of the 1st things I bought all by my self out shopping on my own. Anyway this bag is perfect for all my Uni text books and pencil case.

Another Savers buy are these high heeled plastic jelly shoes. They were meant to be $9.99 but they had an old price tag from Dimmeys which said $2.99 so I asked the shop assistant why the price is more when they are 2nd hand and she gave it to me for only $1.99. So it pays to question the prices at Savers. I bought these again because of another Sportsgirl 12 year old memory. The 1st time I was allowed to go into the city by myself was to go and buy a pair of shoes just like these at Sportsgirl. The ones I bought were clear with glitter and I wore them heaps, but the shoes would fog up in summer, and they got a bit smelly so my mum threw them out. We only lived 5 minutes away from the city in Carlton so it wasn't a big trip but I remember feeling so cool and brave and grown up. Maybe another reason why I remember this day so vividly is because when I got home we went and bought a dog, Buster, who sadly passed away recently :<

Everything I bought at savers the other day has something to do with old memories. I bought this hat for $1.99 not to wear (well maybe to a party) but because in primary school all the cool kids had one and I didn't and ever since I have always wanted one. I might wear it on Friday night to a friends gig who I haven't seen since Tokyo. I'm going to the Toxic Lipstick gig at Roxannes. Toxic Lipstick are an Aussie band from Brissy who lived in Osaka and played at the Spank girls parties in Tokyo all the time. They are back home and playing a gig with that "Melbourne Spank Girl" I met on the train and a few of my old art school friends are going. This will be the 1st time I've been out out since April, which is crazy. I've become such a homebody, I guess because I'm married. I think I might actually go out more from now on though. Henry thinks I'm subconsciously trying to make Melbourne boring so I stay depressed about missing Tokyo. I don't know if that's true or not but I really want to stop the sadness. I've been home 11 months, I was away for 11 months really I should be over it now. How long do people normally have the back home blues for? The thing that makes it worse though is really right now I am living my own personal nightmare. I go to Uni in Footscray and St Albans at Melbourne's worst Uni which I didn't ever think I would do, I work in Market Research which I promised myself I would never do again and I have no good friends at the moment, all of them are overseas. I know it could be worse and I know that there are a lot of good things in my life too like Henry, Hachiko my family and dream job with, but its just hard to escape the sad thoughts that seem never ending.

This may be why I haven't blogged recently. I've begun to feel that the blog makes my sadness worse, I get stressed about not blogging and then I get a few rude comments and I want to delete the whole blog. Then I get heaps and heaps and heaps of lovely comments and I want to keep blogging, which then goes back to the its a never ending cycle. I also am sick of the vacuous, superficial nature fashion blogging, why do I need to show the world what shoes I bought? How is that important? I know it is a good creative outlet, and fashion styling is an art and at least most of my purchases are from op shops and not chain street stores but even then its so pointless. My old Japan blog was just about the fun parties I went to, and that blog is so fun for me to read again while this blog is just "I went shopping and I bought". Maybe on Friday night I'll take some party photos and change the direction of the blog, back to life back to fun. I know I can get out of this "hole" and I'm working towards it. I did see a doctor about it and he believed my depression was just circumstantial and medication wouldn't help, he could see I was working towards a realistic goal and that the depression will go away once I have achieved it. I just have to deal with my current situation. So if I go awol again please don't worry, I'm just having some me time and trying to get my life back on track. I'm now going to go out at least once a week, I already went out last night and saw heaps of old friends...I know I can make Melbourne fun again, like it used to be pre Japan.


  1. I recently went on a bit of a Jelly shoe binge. I now have one clear with glitter pair, one neon pink pair and one blue with glitter (peep toe with ankle straps) pair coming in the post.

    The hilarious part is that I live in London so when exactly I am going to be able to wear these is anyones guess!

    Love the floral print Docs by the way.

  2. oh my god!
    welcome back hayley! I was sooo worried!
    I'm sad to hear all this ;__;
    I somehow understand how you feel even though I have no been living out of this country for 11 months.
    I do not like my city and I don't try to make it fun here... I just wanna get away. I hope you're gonna be fine! (I'm sure you will)
    You should party crazy on friday and take pics!!!
    I don't know what I would do if you delete your blog!!!
    NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! you shouldn't care about the hater comments... they just nonsense bla!

    oh and for ur purchases I abs love the checked dress it's fuuuuuun! I wanna have it!!
    and I'm glad they found ur docs *phew*
    (I just send a package to the US and I hope it will not get lost *prays*)

    ok hun cheer up! and don't forget that you'll be in S.Korea soon!!!

    *hugs* <3

  3. Shit Hayley, I don't know where to begin!!!
    *hugs* is a good starting point!

    Firstly you are brave enough to share this with us so thank you for being so honest with your readers.
    I do hope you don't see your blog as 'I went shopping and I bought'? It is so much more than that, that's why we all tune in every day. You have a distinct style that shines through your photos, and I believe it's why people recognise you in the street. Despite your young age you have done more than the average gal- lived in Japan, gotten married, started your own blog, off to Korea, kick ass job as a street fashion photographer.
    If our blogs were all about what we bought at Savers(lets face it, you could say the same for mine) why would people tune in?
    It's more than that honey so don't give up. Have a break if you need it, we'll all still be here. Imelda might even do up some 'Where's Hayley?' tshirts to get us through.

  4. hi hayley!
    long time reader, first time commenter!
    i love your new docs too, they look so rad!
    i was worried too about where you had gone off too! i even had to start doing some uni work cos i had nothing to read!
    i hope things improve for you soon.
    p.s. i'm a boy, who reads this blog!
    cool hey?

  5. I love you heaps...Mum.

    Coco is right about not caring about negative comments. You could use them to your advantage and post them in a seperate blog as examples of small minded, moronic, depraved behaviour. An expose of nastiness. Group them together under a heading 'MORONS'.

    Coco I hope you fulfill your dreams.

  6. welcome back and sorry to hear you aren't feeling so great. I understand missing being away from home but it's good you have something to look forward to.

    i haven't got a scrap of credit (or money) until after the weekend so I'll send you an email right now about catch up on friday!


  7. I love those docs and I am very jealous.

    LOL when I sore that hat in the photo before the text, I was Like hey I had a hat just like that when I was a kid.

    I had a feeling that things weren't great with you, I'm sorry that I'm useless and can't pull you out of your hole, but if you let me I'd like to help, my ears are always open.
    I know that once you start going out too parties, keeping busy and meeting up with friends it'll make the sadness less over time. It doesn't happen straight away but it will happen.

    Look at me, I'm a complete shut in sometimes, I find it so easy closing myself off from the world and feeling sorry for myself. But the moment I start doing stuff and getting out there catching up with friends, I feel real again. I have another thing that helps but I'll tell you when I see you next.

    It's hard too believe you get hate comments. Some people are just plain jerks and are probably jealous your blog is popular. But you aren't the only one. When I did the youtube thing, 20% of every comment I got were Hate ones.
    You need to focus on the good ones, and the good ones you get are really lovely, People really like you Hayley and they love your blog.

    With the whole blog thing, maybe you need to create another blog or a journal that's secret and no one can comment on. It might feel good to just be free to write about anything without fear.

  8. doesn't it help to vent your feelings through your blog?
    keep blogging, i'd totally miss you if you stopped.

    lovely savers purchases!
    love the floral docs and checked dress .' clashing' checks with florals or florals with floral looks awesome.

  9. Check out these glitter jellies, they sound like the childhood ones you described:

    They are on Ebay and the bidding ends in 11 hours. So far they are at £2.20

  10. Hey Glowing doll. Wow those are the exact same shoes, wowow. Sadly they are 1 size too small for me :< but hopefully they will get another pair, I'll keep an eye out.

    Thanks everyone for your nice encouraging comments. I'm already feeling better, I just had to get it all out. I love your comments and I love your blogs and my internet is back and so am I baby.


  11. all i can say is that you need to wake up to your self... you are 24 for christ sake! stop winging and whining... the world is a massive adventure, just because u had an awsome experience once in your life, doesnt mean you cant have that exerience again and again anywhere u might be!! if i saw you in the street id be wanting to walk up and slap you...


  12. Anon. I agree with you, but the thing with depression is it hard to just snap out of it like you say. I feel guilty about feeling like this, I know I'm still young and I have nothing to complain about but its hard when every day you don't feel like waking up.

  13. I am an ebayholic(I'm there like everyday which is kinda sad!) and will let you know if I find a size 8.

    So glad you're back! You're blog has been a real inspiration to me.

  14. Hayley I know exactly how you feel.
    Considering the hecticness of my life I decided my blog would be for me when I wanted to share style related things. As soon as it becomes stressful and not so fun anymore, Ill stop. I guess thats why my posts are irregular.
    Theres no pressure to post everyday! When you post though we read, enjoy and appreciate :)

  15. looooooooooove the jelly shoes! i am a bit of a melissa adict, to be honest! love your blog too!

  16. Yay! Hayley it's good to see you back. I'm very sorry that you are (or maybe were) feeling crummy. I agree wholeheartedly with what Lady Melbourne wrote - besides even if your blog was just "What I bought at Savers" I'd still be reading because I'm such a stickybeak.

    That sequinned cap reminds me of this really annoying flatmate I had when I was about 20 who gave me one of those as a gift (no irony), and then constantly hassled me to wear it. My style role model of the time was kinderwhore Courtney Love and Kat Bjelland from Babes in Toyland - the sequinned cap was just so random.

    PS. Your house is adorable.

  17. gee that's smart slapping someone who is depressed across the face...mmmm wonder why the doctors haven't cottoned on to that one yet!!!!!!

  18. Hi Hayley,

    First of all - hugs.

    I've been reading your blog since you were in Japan but just never commented before. I want to say that though I love the fashion on your blog, it's the personal details that really make it stand out from the others. I've started reading a lot of "fashion" blogs, yours is one of the few I've stuck with.

    I know you're feeling a bit rubbish right now, but things will get better, they always do. I'd say you probably have a bit of the winter blues right now, and thinking about Japan just makes it all worse.

    I'd like to strongly recommend that you don't take any medication - I did it to get over a hump, and it took four years to get off them. They do work, but at a cost. Don't listen to people who tell you to just get over it - they're lucky people who've never had a down day and can't understand.

    Anyway, I hope you feel better soon. And remember - you have friends all over the world, thinking about you and cheering you on - even if they just read and don't comment!

    Keep on fashioning -

    A fan from Ireland.


  19. Hayley, I found your blog through a post on Lady Melbourne and I just love it!

    You have such a fresh, unique, strong style. In the pic under your profile you look like a gorgeous, naughty doll :) Love your makeup there.

    Your house looks fab, I love all the red and you have so many cute pieces...I have a thing for antlers so I love the pieces on your wall :)

  20. Gosh it sounds like you have been going through a bit of a rough time lately.

    Just reading the other comments I guess it's difficult for some people to understand what it's like for you and why this is happening considering you are young and talented and the world is your oyster blah blah blah. Plus they have probably never experienced something like this. I think those people need to step back and relaise that this is a clinical condition that can't just be snapped out of. What you need right now is to surround yourself with loved ones and do the things you enjoy and love. If the stupid negative comments are annoying you (probably not a good idea considering what you are going though right now) maybe you should turn off comments for the time being?

    If it's any comfort to you I have had a couple friends go depression lately - it's tough, but you will get through it! You need to think positive though!

    Right! Onto the fashion. Love both dresses - and the docs are awesome. I most definitely think you can mix the prints. they look great with the floral dress and I think stripes in similar hues would look great too. I do remember thought you posting about not liking stripes, but even striped socks or a scarf in similar hues might add interest.

    Your blog is awesome - one of the best! It is no way just a "what I bought today blog" - it so so much more. Keeping at it - but only if you are having fun! xx

  21. Hey Hayley,
    I don't know if this will make you feel better or worse but it's a pretty interesting read:
    ...via Fops and Dandies. x

  22. I cannot believe you can get something for $10 and less! Your blog has made me want to move to Melbourne even more... some day, some day.

    P.S. love ze docs.


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